information super-Highway Bloggery

A few months ago I had several people leave SPAM in the comments section of several of my blog entries. The reason this really ripped me was because they were - wait for it! - Life Coaches.

They read my entries and left remarks in which they sold their own services, offered classes, etc. Some were very blatant, others were much more subtle but they were clearly advertisements, nonetheless.

I won't waste my time telling you what I think of the ethics and level of professionalism of these individuals, who call themselves coaches. I mean really, who would want to hire someone who advertises themselves through someone else's work rather than taking the time to develop their own site?

So, for a few months I was not allowing any comments on my blog. But now, you may once again leave comments on the postings. You will, however, have to take one extra step which is to type in a word that will come up in a rather cryptic way. I'm sure you've done them before.

Hopefully this will keep out the unimaginative parasites who are unable to create their own voice and presence. We'll see, anyway.

Christmas... are we having fun yet?

In my experience, the people who feel let down, resentful and even sad at the end of the holiday season are those who celebrate Christmas Day.

"WHAT?" I can hear you all the way over here!

It's true. Pinning all your hopes for fun, gaiety, cheer, quality family time, and looking for a good return on your shopping/preparing investment, places an unrealistic demand on the day that, in all likelihood, can't be realized. We might not even be aware that we're doing it. But each time we grumble about shopping lines, traffic jams, someone's bad behaviour, late deliveries, etc., we are unconsciously telling Christmas Day that it better come through with a good payoff for all this aggravation we're suffering in the name of Christmas.

What I have found is that the people who enjoy the holidays most are the ones who celebrate the holiday season. Some may start with the Solstice, lighting candles, bringing greens into the house, decorating the tree. Christmas shopping becomes a date with a friend, partner, or kids and often includes lunch or dinner. The difference is that all the preparations become occasions in their own right, rather than Christmas Day being the occasion itself. There's more behind those Twelve Days of Christmas than swimming swans, leaping lords, milking maids and golden rings, it seems!

Deciding how much money you're going to spend on each gift, how you'll choose to give the gifts (Chinese Auction, family grab bag, Secret Santa are just a few) can also be an occasion for a seasonal family get-together. Planning and shopping for the Christmas dinner can also be its own occasion. Forgoing regular supermarket aisles for speciality shops can make shopping feel like an occasion.

I suppose it's like any other process/outcome situation: The process offers its own beauty, value and gifts - which can be overlooked when we're focused only on the outcome.
So, rather focusing on the day itself, imbuing those 12 hours or so with the expectation that all the shopping, planning, cooking, baking, decorating and hopes for family peace will harmoniously converge for a 12 hour amazing, glossy-magazine, Kodak-moment Christmas experience...try making a celebration of the entire season, rather than treating it like a dress rehearsal for the "real" thing.

What living life on purpose means...One woman's thoughts

I talk a lot about "living life on purpose", and I thought it might be a good idea to explain exactly what I mean when I say it.
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To me, we're living our lives on purpose when we live our lives with intention and mindfulness, rather than operating out of "default mode".

In computer-speak, default mode is a programmed response to repeated input: you don't have to make a choice, you're pre-programmed and "good to go". We don't stop and question the situation in front of us or our patterned response to it.

A good example of that is something I think most of us have experienced at one time or another: Think of a time when you were driving and suddenly realized you didn't remember passing the familiar landmarks necessary to get where you are because you were on auto-pilot or in default mode. Your mind was somewhere else, and your driving became an out-of-body experience. Yikes! What's worse is that some people lives their lives that way.

When we live your life on purpose we are:

• Creating goals or intentions that lead to a fulfilling life of contentment and meaning
• Aware that every action we take and decision we make with either bring us closer to or move us further away from the life we desire
• Present to the moments of our lives.

Remember the driving metaphor above? Well, if life is a journey, we can choose not only the destination, but how we're going to get there!

Back Again!

It's been a long time since I've made an entry, and I'm ready to be back. It's been a busy Autumn - I've been in Maine since October with trips to Canada, Dallas and Connecticut to keep me connected and on my toes in between planning workshops and working with clients here in the States. All in all, time has flown and....

The holidays are here, aren't they? I've made a conscious decision this year not to get "hooked" by all the commercialism and stress that has become the real Hallmark of the season. I got so annoyed when businesses started advertising their Christmas sales in early October in an effort to compete with fuel bills, and ensure their profit margins. The message was to buy your Christmas presents then and go in debt to pay for your fuel bills later. Bah Humbug!

Anyway, one of the things I've been working on with a colleague of mine is a gentle holiday survival guide we're calling The Twelve Days of Calmness. I've also been working on Living Your Life On Purpose Newsletter, the newsletter I've been threatening to launch for several months now. If you'd like to subscribe to this free newsletter, just e-mail me at mgblifecoach@yahoo.com and put "subscribe" in the subject box.

This first issue has some great information about the Winter Solstice and some thought-provoking questions. If you subscribe, I'll also send you a copy of Twelve Days...my gift to you in an effort to spread CALM throughout this holiday season.

Well, that's me done for now. I think in my next blog, probably on Thursday, I'll explain what I mean by Living Your Life on Purpose.

'Til then, be well.