Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Christmas... are we having fun yet?


In my experience, the people who feel let down, resentful and even sad at the end of the holiday season are those who celebrate Christmas Day.

"WHAT?" I can hear you all the way over here!

It's true. Pinning all your hopes for fun, gaiety, cheer, quality family time, and looking for a good return on your shopping/preparing investment, places an unrealistic demand on the day that, in all likelihood, can't be realized. We might not even be aware that we're doing it. But each time we grumble about shopping lines, traffic jams, someone's bad behaviour, late deliveries, etc., we are unconsciously telling Christmas Day that it better come through with a good payoff for all this aggravation we're suffering in the name of Christmas.

What I have found is that the people who enjoy the holidays most are the ones who celebrate the holiday season. Some may start with the Solstice, lighting candles, bringing greens into the house, decorating the tree. Christmas shopping becomes a date with a friend, partner, or kids and often includes lunch or dinner. The difference is that all the preparations become occasions in their own right, rather than Christmas Day being the occasion itself. There's more behind those Twelve Days of Christmas than swimming swans, leaping lords, milking maids and golden rings, it seems!

Deciding how much money you're going to spend on each gift, how you'll choose to give the gifts (Chinese Auction, family grab bag, Secret Santa are just a few) can also be an occasion for a seasonal family get-together. Planning and shopping for the Christmas dinner can also be its own occasion. Forgoing regular supermarket aisles for speciality shops can make shopping feel like an occasion.

I suppose it's like any other process/outcome situation: The process offers its own beauty, value and gifts - which can be overlooked when we're focused only on the outcome.
So, rather focusing on the day itself, imbuing those 12 hours or so with the expectation that all the shopping, planning, cooking, baking, decorating and hopes for family peace will harmoniously converge for a 12 hour amazing, glossy-magazine, Kodak-moment Christmas experience...try making a celebration of the entire season, rather than treating it like a dress rehearsal for the "real" thing.